This the Season of Apologies…

7 Nov

Tis the Season of Apologies…

11/07/2013

We all recall the apologies we made that we didn’t want to and the apologies we await that our offenders didn’t want to give. This is a season of famous apologies first came Mr. N Peethambara Kurup’s sincere apology on national TV and by a phone call to the lady who then was chided by her father to put an end to this man’s misery by withdrawing the case against him. While DG was wondering about this apology business along came apologies into hundred times from Goa minister for comparing Nigerians to cancer.

That reminded DG of her tween years when she and bro fought they put dogs and cats to shame. It happens in all home now she knows then she was told she was the only bad apple in the whole world. Coming back to apologies, so you hit your baby brother because he was being a pest when you wanted to read comics with your girl friend and he wanted to stick his grade two picture book between you two and talk about the roger rabbit. Now he is crying his lungs out so mother comes running and drags him along to soothe him, once crying stops he gives you two punches and now you are mad running after him for his dear life. It is then dad steps in and slaps you now you have one extra punch from brother and one from dad. So after lots of he said she said dad yells, “both of you just shut up.” All other families in the world are in peace except ours and you are the source of all trouble now here is your punishment write hundred times, “I am sorry. I will not hit my brother and I will call  him Bhai ji.” Why should I call him Bhai ji, he is younger. Two tight slaps more now the balance is one punch from brother and one slap from dad plus the two new ones plus the writing exercise. But nobody will listen to you, you are the wronged party and you are being forced to apologies rather apologies are extracted from you. Your tears won’t leave your eyes even if you drank a gallon of water they just ditched you. You keep wondering how this six year boy manages tears so readily. After lots of reasoning, stomping and crying all you can manage is for dad to ask bother to do the same written apology, “I am sorry. I will not hit my sister and I will call her didi ji.” But you see that it doesn’t make it write this written exercise is evened out not those four slaps.

Parents want peace they are not interested in justice. As kids come with no manuals so parents apply the hit and trial method. First they begin by assuming the older one is trouble so needs to be put to test after a little while they realize their little angel is no lesser beast so they go by who initiated the fight holds more responsibility. Then they realise the fight still didn’t end but just got carried forward to another day so now their final weapon is to punish both irrespective of who was at the fault. Moral of the story is those hundred apologies and four slaps plus nth slaps the issue never got resolved now we don’t fight like Tom and Jerry but the fight still continues to date.

Readers might be wondering about the “I am sorry” part oh, that was a means of buying peace and getting out of grounding. Of course it was sincere didn’t I tell you we wrote it hundred times if we weren’t sincere then why would we waste our time writing that. Oh, you are right that was the only way to get dad off our backs and get back to each others. So much for sincerity…

While DG was mulling over the sincerity of her apologies there came mother of all apologies, yes, Rob Ford apologized again. Since yesterday when Ms D came back after visiting her mom across the border we have been laughing our hearts out this guy is desi, first deny then apologize but never quit the office.

Then there was Japanese apology for the comfort women and a nation in shame for Holocaust then there was apartheid and so on… Did any apology change anything? At least someone had the courage to say sorry but in desi land we say sorry to buy peace and repeat…

2 Responses to “This the Season of Apologies…”

  1. Sex And The Indian Citiese November 9, 2013 at p11 #

    my mom used to make us do errands , equal he was made to wash clothes and I was asked to do dishes .In the end me and bro would sit down and plan how w should not fight in front of mom ..kaam karna par jata hai :):)

    on serious note , its sometimes is about ego , some times about lack of anything better . Its strange how such acts by parents effect sibling relationship .

    Like

  2. Huzaifa Pandit November 8, 2013 at p11 #

    The saying goes angrez chalay gaye sorry pichay chod gaye. sorry aka apology is a magical word but overuse it or demand its usage as many desi parents obviously are in the habit of doing, demeans and devalues the gesture. it merely relegates it to another totem, another sign of a hollow relationship- Kudos DG for putting it across so succinctly🙂 enjoyed this touching post❤

    Thank you,
    DG

    Like

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