People Come into Your Life for a Reason

5 Dec

PEOPLE COME INTO YOUR LIFE FOR A REASON

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.

They have come to assist you through a difficulty,

to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.

They may seem like a godsend and they are.

They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,

this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.

Sometimes they die.

Sometimes they walk away.

Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.

What we must realize is that our need has been met,

our desire fulfilled, their work is done.

 The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to

share, grow or learn.

They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.

They may teach you something you have never done.

They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.

Believe it, it is real. But only for a season!

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build

upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.

Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have

learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season

or a lifetime.

 

In June 2006 DG received this message as a chain mail from a friend. She detests chain mails and just presses delete on them. But this was an exception as it came from Rinky, given her history of communicating it seemed crucial to open it. It had the above message and it further read… I am sending this to you to see how many actually read their e-mail.  Your response will be interesting.  Pay attention to what you read.  After you have finished reading it, you will know the reason it was sent to you. DG read it carefully and this is what she concluded:

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.  When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.  When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.   

DG thought about all the people who came into her life at any given time and her life circumstances at that time. It felt so true, even of times when these people exited her life it became ever clearer what need was met and what she learned from it. Old man B came into her life just after she came to know she was divorced. She was in shock and was distrustful of ever finding happiness. She needed a friend who she could trust to believe in herself. Those short four months were one of the best times in her life. She’ll always respect old man B for making her feel safe and believing life is all about possibilities. They parted on ideological differences but DG fondly recalls those times and sends peace and joy to him.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are.  They are there for the reason you need them to be.  

DG had met Ms J at her church couple of times before she became homeless on reporting abuse. Ms J is a scientist like DG had married out of caste and religion. They both were pregnant around same time but could not keep in touch as DG miscarried and soon became homeless and Ms J went to Des. Friendless and homeless DG one time called her. On knowing DG’s situation Ms J neither gave a word of advice nor interrogated her rather asked how she could help. She really knew how to help an abused.  She offered to buy her a cell phone and include her on her bill. Later Ms J gave DG $8000.00 so that she could meet the financial statement requirements for F1 visa. She visited DG in hospital couple of times and loaned her money when she lost her scholarship due to relapse. She never laid conditions on her help and never judged DG. Her kindness reinforced DG’s faith in humanity. DG blesses her and her family.

During the same time she was introduced to Prof. C, her partner S and Prof. B they were all there to hold her hand when she was confined and could not see.

While DG was still homeless when she had a massive hit and run (she was a pedestrian). She was too broken to be sent to Des and could not live on her own either (her insurance did not pay for rehab). Her options were to go back to her abuser or seek help from desi community that was more inclined to send her back to him. She called upon a kind white Sikh family she had met couple of times during her homelessness. They took her in and nursed back to healthy both physically, emotionally and spiritually. She lived with them as family, after three years they asked her to move (as they were in need of room). It was exactly the time DG was ready to soar. Her proud spiritual parents looked at this move with pride; they had done a great job of fixing DG.

 Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.  Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.  What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done.  

DG recalled MM and Seem. MM was her junior in school and Seem was her classmate; both were so protective about her and so loving. Even their families accepted DG into their homes and made her hostel stay comfortable.  DG started avoiding MM as he had been pointing too many fingers at DG’s academic laziness and then everybody just moved on with their lives. And Seem she  just slipped through DG’s hands like sand on her palm. Couple of years ago MM spotted DG on net but her obsession with not to be part of any social networking sites did not gel well. She will always remember their kindness with a smile.
 
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.  Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.  

DG wanted a project to work on and some romance in her life so God forsaken now ex walked into her life. There was no scope of sharing but enough for personal awareness and learning. She learned a lot about the magnanimity of her creator, her Resilience, value of life and happiness. The day she said her creator is her provider not her spouse it set her free from all fear in a foreign land and a new chapter opened in her life.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.  

Sister H, is DG’s guardian angel and she makes her laugh every time they meet.
 
They may teach you something you have never done.  

John and Ann her homeless friends taught her even those not in positions to give would like to share what ever they can. Often her friends on the streets would like her to accept a cookie or water besides their hugs. Once she did and it felt good because she saw the light of hope and acceptance in their eyes. Not just giving but to be able to accept  is also a blessing. Homelessness makes people invisible to rest of the world, as if you don’t exist and don’t matter anymore. Yes, DG knows it because once upon a time she was one.
 
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.  

Both her God children give DG so  much spiritual joy she cannot put it in words…

Believe it, it is real. But only for a season! 

Yes, only for a season coz’ there are numerous others whose names are not mentioned here but DG respectfully recalls each one of them.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.  Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.  

It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.  Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

Each comment writer at GGTS enriches DG’s life and experience manifold.

>0 Replies – you may need to work on your “people skills”
>2 Replies – you are nice but probably need to be more outgoing
>4 Replies – you have picked your friends well
>6 Replies – you are downright popular
>8 Replies or More – you are totally awesome (and that’s probably why you’re
>on MY list)

First time DG sent it out she received 5 responses. Yes, sent it to only 5 people excluding Rinky. Check out how many you receive.

DG believes in moving forward and living in present. She has tried to keep in touch with people but she doesn’t believe in going back and seeking long-lost connections. Please share what do you think.

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13 Responses to “People Come into Your Life for a Reason”

  1. Rinzu Rajan February 27, 2013 at p02 #

    Experience makes you a good adviser! I really miss good blogs that talk of experiences and life! Wow this just made my day! Will watch this space! i write here all the ills and thrills of life

    http://www.rinzurajan.blogspot.in

    @Rinzu Rajan,
    welcome to GGTS, a safe space.
    Glad it made ou feel good.
    Please share this message of hope with anyone who may benefit.
    Peace,
    Desi Girl

    Like this

  2. Huzaifa May 25, 2012 at p05 #

    Wipe the blood off your feet, cleanse them thoroughly!
    When these bloody sodden roads harden,
    A hundred new roads will be unsheathed dourly,
    Steady your heart; strengthen it, for presently,
    A hundred lances will pierce it mercilessly –
    A thousand spears will pinion it to the cross!

    your words ring so true DG!! Seasons or reasons both are equally important and both leave indelible marks on our lives!! the key is to move on!! But it is not easy to bell the cat! far easier said than done yet one must do it if one has to live!!

    @Huzaifa,
    Welcome to GGTS, a safe space.
    Those are very beautiful words.

    Sorry your comment went unapproved for a very longtime. DG is bogged down with emails and messages it takes her too much time to get to GGTS these days.
    Please share this message of hope with anyone who may benefit.
    Peace,
    Desi Girl

    Like this

  3. Deeps December 9, 2010 at p12 #

    Immensely moving words, DG. They ring so true. Every person who enter your life is there for a reason. If you realize that and feel grateful for them, life would be so much more meaningful.

    God bless you, DG!

    Thank you.

    Like this

  4. anjugandhi December 7, 2010 at p12 #

    When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.

    They have come to assist you through a difficulty,

    to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
    how very right
    and who else will know it better than we two hahhaahah

    Like this

  5. Mysticspirit December 6, 2010 at p12 #

    Hey DG – another great post. Very true – there’s always a reason why people come into your life and its important to look for the positive side to it. If there’s nothing positive to it, I remember the saying, if it doesn’t kill you, it will make you stronger. Keep writing dear.
    Divorced doodling

    @Mysticspirit,
    Welcome to GGTS, a safe space.
    Yes, DG also believes, if it doesn’t kill you…
    Even the negative experiences have so much to learn from, learn about self.

    Please share this message of hope with anyone who may benefit.

    Peace,
    Desi Girl

    Like this

  6. Vivek December 6, 2010 at p12 #

    //Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
    this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.//

    This is truly a gem of a statement. Its re-iterates that relationships can be so fragile.

    @IHM – I hope this poem soothes some of your pain for your daughter’s loss

    @Vivek,
    Welcome to GGTS, a safe space.
    DG feels every relationship has an expiry date, shelf lives are long and short depending on our needs and circumstances. One year at Summer Solstice some one accepted her as a soul sister but very next year we did not find anything common. It was if the previous year we needed each other to experience that particular spiritual connection and next year we moved on and no regrets or complaints.
    Hey, what do you think about getting back with long lost pals? Should one go for it or let it go…

    Yes, IHM was in my thoughts when I wrote this post and she was the first comment writer too.

    Please share this message of hope with anyone who may benefit.
    Peace,
    Desi Girl

    Like this

    • Vivek December 7, 2010 at p12 #

      @Desigirl

      I knew it! I had read IHM’s post about her daughter and then I read this post and my intuition told me that u had written it partly bcoz of her as well.

      And as far as friends are concerned, I haven’t really made any as I prefer to live alone :)

      So, can’t comment on that.

      Cheers,
      Vivek

      @Vivek,
      I did think about IHM while writing this post but I did not write it for her because she is my lamp post of personal strength. The way she is treading through her grief is commendable.

      This post was taking an inventory of personal journey and those who touched my life with kindness. I wanted to put up a poll on if one should be knocking the old closed doors. Even I believe in Ekla Chalo re…
      Thanks,
      DG

      Like this

      • Vivek December 7, 2010 at p12 #

        Yes..Alone is the way to be..

        I do not know about that coz’ friends add spice to life and DG couldn’t have made it without the support of friends. Ekla chalo re works for DG only in following her heart and seeking her peace.

        Like this

  7. Smitha December 6, 2010 at p12 #

    DG, Everything you say here, makes so much sense. Every person we meet in life is there for a purpose, and I think if we think like this, we are far less likely to be bitter or expect too much. Loved this post, DG!

    Like this

  8. Bikram December 6, 2010 at p12 #

    YEah true people come in ur life for a reason and maybe for a season, but then as you said for some unknow reason they end a realtion and break ur heart well i have had a few of those just recetnly where … anyway but then thats good cause its taught me something .. DONT make new friends and DONT let anyone enter your space..

    so true they come for a reason they taught me something made me a bit more wiser now … not to trust people who say all the stuff and dont mean any at all …

    they ahd there fun , i learnt s oboth are happy …

    Bikram’s

    @Bikram,
    Heart breaks do happen when we put more in a relationship than we can afford to loose. At least that way we learn how much we can endure and where we went wrong. DG feels the word “friend” is thrown around so casually that it has lost it’s meaning. She believes in wait and watching to let it season. Please don’t be bitter be kind to your self. Look at DG, still after five years is struggling to get back on her feet.
    Sending you kind thoughts and positive energy,
    Peace,
    Desi Girl

    Like this

  9. Neeha December 6, 2010 at p12 #

    I crossed your blog but never read any post.
    When we discussed something relating to Tbg’s buzz,I thought you are having so many negative thoughts about marriage & always focusing on abused,so that might effect your career.But now after reading this post I came to know that all these words are born from experience.
    Glad to meet you
    Lots of hugs,
    Take care.

    @Neeha,
    Welcome to GGTS, a safe space.
    DG and negative thoughts don’t go together :) because life is too short and there is too much positive to be grateful for. Yes, she does have some bad days even in those days the greatest blessing is to be alive.

    Please share this message of hope with anyone who may benefit.
    Peace,
    DG

    Like this

  10. starsinmeyes December 6, 2010 at p12 #

    Loved this post. It’s the principle I’ve followed in my life, gives wonderful comfort and helps introspect rather than chasing behind people who’ve moved on, or wondering if I’m wrong to have moved on.

    I believe this, and reading Brian Weiss has reinforced it…people come into our lives and exit it for a reason.

    I also think that some nasties come into our life to help us learn something about how not to be that way, how not to choose what they did and how sometimes we’re doing the exact same thing we’re criticising them for!

    @starsinmeyes,
    Welcome to GGTS, a safe space.
    You are right, negative people and situations do cross our path or else how will we know the value of positive. They teach us about what not to do. DG takes all encounters as opportunities to resolve karma. :)

    Please share this message hope with anyone who may benefit.
    Peace,
    Desi Girl

    Like this

  11. Indian Homemaker December 5, 2010 at p12 #

    Beautiful words…

    Like this

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The Life and Times of an Indian Homemaker

My life and everything that touches it....

Kafila

media | politics | dissent

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मेरे विचारो का

समाजवादी जनपरिषद

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